The last of your family finally left your house. It was a lot over the holidays. You can put half your life’s savings into therapy —good therapy, effective therapy — and the first day of your holiday family reunion, you still become hopelessly enmeshed in the same old crazy dynamics. Your assertiveness training goes out the window the minute your sister begins her traditional temper tantrum. A mere sigh from your grandmother triggers an attack of codependency so severe you end up giving her your house. For many people, family get-togethers require strategies for staying out of such sticky situations. Speaking of sticky, now that the family went through the woods and over the rive back home, it’s time to celebrate with a sticky beer flight — a flight we’re calling Peaks and Pints Beer Flight: Holiday Family Time.
Peaks and Pints Beer Flight: Holiday Family Time
Prairie Blueberry Boyfriend
5.4% ABV
After several weeks of courtship, your little sister has established a partnership with a human male. In a brief yet giddy discussion, relationship was determined to be “boyfriend-girlfriend.” Having spent most of her adult life single, you find this new pairing most intriguing since he adores blueberries, and your sister notoriously despises them. So, they family has dubbed him, “Blueberry Boyfriend”. Prairie Artisan Ales’ Blueberry Boyfriend is a sour ale fling brewed with blueberries and lemon zest, which find a harmonious relationship with a slight tinge of that classic Prairie funk that you’ve come to know and love. The berry is strongly blueberry, but hints of strawberry, raspberry, and blackberry.
Stone Arrogant Bastard Ale
7.2% ABV
At this year’s big family Christmas dinner, the teen ended up on the comfy couch by the window. It’s the prime spot in the room — near the food, great view, just perfect. Your cousin, Sibyl, 38, was sitting on the floor near the teen with a few other people. Sibyl has always been a bit dramatic about things, and she started complaining that she was too old to sit on the floor anymore. She made a whole big scene about how her knees hurt and how no one had the decency to offer her a chair. Finally, after listening for 30 minutes, the teen called her an arrogant bastard and stormed off to her room. Rude. The Arrogant Bastard Ale, brewed by Stone Brewing, is also rude. The beer proclaims boldly “You’re Not Worthy”. That kind of trash talk from a beer might excited you to prove yourself worthy of the gnarly looking Gargoyle on the bottle. Arrogant Bastard is less-than-amber but more-than-pale IPA with a little “oomph” in the malt and hops department. The malt profile of Arrogant Bastard, while not overwhelming, has a good backbone of caramel, rich, and somewhat raisin-bread type toasty flavors. It has more richness than your standard IPA. This malt body is balanced with a very aggressive-tasting hop treatment using the Chinook, giving it a West Coast citrusy bitterness, but also contains a richer, herbal, and maybe even a bit of a “rough” pungent element.
Away Days Bucket Hat Bobby
9% ABV
Harnessing the spirits of all slain and martyred chickens through the inverted KFC bucket on his head, your cousin Bobby has come along way since getting the top of his head scratched off in Colonel Sanders’s fabled hen-house disaster — although he still hits the barleywine hard. It’s only appropriate to include Away Days Brewing’s Bucket Hat Bobby barleywine on this flight. Although less heavy than other barleywines, Bucket Hat Bobby has raisin, toffee, fig, and big caramel flavor with subtle sweetness balanced by bitterness. The only thing missing might be coleslaw, mashed potatoes and a biscuit.
Everybody’s Uncle Stepdad
10% ABV
OK, let’s do the math. If you and your brother are full siblings, then his uncle is also your uncle. This leaves the question: Is the uncle your mother’s brother or your bio father’s brother? We think we can take it that your mother is not now married to her brother. So, we must conclude that she is now married to her brother-in-law. Everybody’s Brewing Uncle Stepdad started his life as Everybody’s imperial stout. He was already cool. But, after 10 months of aging in bourbon barrels during the winter, spring and summer, he’s a new man. Wiser, more sophisticated, and complex, Uncle Stepdad offers a combination of chocolate, rusted Dodge on blocks, raisins, pizza stains on the wifebeater, dark cherries, Confederate flag, vanilla, hefty bag for a window, and chocolate. Expect subtle but fantastic bourbon notes and an Iroc Z on the finish.
Black Raven Great Grandfather Raven
10.5% ABV
Oh, yes, Great Grandfather arrived for the holidays. Ginned up, as usual. It’s probably his last hurrah with your famous caramel mocha cake. In honor of Great Grandfather Victor, we added Black Raven Brewing’s Great Grandfather bourbon barrel-aged Russian imperial stout to this family flight. This robust black ale is full of rich dark caramel, unsweetened chocolate, with hints of coffee all mellowed with smooth oak and top shelf bourbon notes.
LINK: Peaks & Pints beer and cider cooler inventory
